Ferocious judgementalism goes with the territory if you run any religious site. I recall a "Christian Order" article from the paper based 1980s by the late Michael Davies. Michael, by all accounts, was a most amiable gentleman and a most loving husband and father.
His article described the ludicrous sedevacantist shambles of the day, when at least four "Popes" reigned in various countries. Michael lamented the most unChristian attitudes visible across various Traditionalist Catholic publications. This was long before the Internet, so photocopying and self publication had to transmit the bile. Then, a page or two later, he declared sedevacantism to be a Satanically inspired movement and that we should shun any sedevacantist.
Having been the target of any amount of on line abuse, I can only suggest the brilliant advice allegedly seen outside a church.
"If a man speaks to you harshly, do not answer likewise, but use a gentle word. It is commanded by Holy Writ and, further, it makes him madder than anything else you could possibly say".
Excellent article. You continue on a good, valuable and wise path. I too, like you, raised in fear based . I can say this, dear, you WILL, come out into a place of solid on the inside while chaos on the outside. Solid, not always peaceful. Some things I have found out in life will not be healed perfectly, but will be perfectly healed for each of us in Our Creator's timing and radiance. Some damage of thinking, of personality traits, of impulsiveness, of compulsiveness, of isolations will remain. But it will be overcome by grace. And it will take day by day time. And you are on that wonderful path. Bravo. When Jesus was on the Cross, He must have looked out and saw only His loyal Mother and a few accompanying women and John there. No other relatives. Mary also knew this too. She was virtually alone. And think not that she didn't carry sadness with her as she walked the rest of her life. She was not divine. And Jesus, when he arose from the dead, carried the scars of the Cross on his body. They were not healed perfectly. Just perfectly healed enough for us to know. Damage, scars, we CAN carry them. Fear, cowardess (me), lack fo fortitude, internal confusion, soul damage, can be carried. We take that yoke upon us. And walk acqwardly on, stumbling, backing up, backing out, facing up, failing. No one is living your life. No one walks in your shoes. No one in this entire God beloved world has your dna, your fingerprints, your personality, your anything. You are unique with a set of characteristics God gave you. I will say this about myself. I was raised by a highly damaged parent, who singled me out for trouble. Professionals told my Dad to get me away from her. Counsellors told me to leave her. But the Church told me to honor my mother. You see where this is going. I will say one wonderful thing about me (and perhaps you, too), I can distinguish love from non love, pure care from manipulating care, good from evil, rational thinking from irrational. This is good, especially in the face of a Church being run upside down, in the nuances of priests homilies that just don't ring right. The understanding of bible passages offered to us that are not quite complete. And a Pope who very few really understand. You do. I'm sure. Keep going. You are doing good. All will be well. All will be well. And in all things, all will be well. (Julian of Norwich?, I believe?)
I gotta admit, I have never before now heard the word "empath" in any context except Star Trek: The Next Generation. ^_^' I had to google it. That introversion can be confused with the empath / CPTSD thing…that gives me a lot to think about. I have some loved ones very close to me who describe themselves as introverted or shy, and this has me wondering if it might be more trauma-informed.
Thanks again for giving so much food for thought. :)
Hi Steve, I think this talk by Msgr. James Shea provides great insight into differing world views and provides a clear path forward: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y_q7iV4MhKE
I mean, as far as "inefficacy" of the Sacraments, a lot of Twitter'll always give Judas a run for his money. Nothing will transform someone who doesn't want to be transformed, to save someone who doesn't want to be saved, so long as God respects Free Will. (And believe me, there's times I wish He didn't...) Much of Trad Twitter will worship the gods made in their own images until they cannot avoid the real one anymore at their particular judgements.
I find this post interesting because I had a lot of that same toxicity and "trauma," (not a fan of the word, honestly,) thanks to a bi-polar-II mother, but at the same point in time, thanks to the Asperger's from Dad, I never developed the "empath" people-assessment thing, at least not on the sort of instinctual level you describe. However, once I started chucking the things I *could* observe through the same part of my brain to which I fed calculus to in college, yeah, what you described was as "there" as I think it ever *could* be in my case. I realized that nothing angered my mother more than my not giving a heck, because it meant she couldn't manipulate me the way she could my two younger sisters. (Heck, I think those two sometimes resent me for it, too...)
However, I think now that not giving a heck is a superpower *until* it's because you *can't* give a heck. Before, I couldn't give a heck simply because of what I just didn't know. Now, I more often worry about becoming *too* numb, too cynical, too jaded, too bitter, you know?
Steve,
Ferocious judgementalism goes with the territory if you run any religious site. I recall a "Christian Order" article from the paper based 1980s by the late Michael Davies. Michael, by all accounts, was a most amiable gentleman and a most loving husband and father.
His article described the ludicrous sedevacantist shambles of the day, when at least four "Popes" reigned in various countries. Michael lamented the most unChristian attitudes visible across various Traditionalist Catholic publications. This was long before the Internet, so photocopying and self publication had to transmit the bile. Then, a page or two later, he declared sedevacantism to be a Satanically inspired movement and that we should shun any sedevacantist.
Having been the target of any amount of on line abuse, I can only suggest the brilliant advice allegedly seen outside a church.
"If a man speaks to you harshly, do not answer likewise, but use a gentle word. It is commanded by Holy Writ and, further, it makes him madder than anything else you could possibly say".
Excellent article. You continue on a good, valuable and wise path. I too, like you, raised in fear based . I can say this, dear, you WILL, come out into a place of solid on the inside while chaos on the outside. Solid, not always peaceful. Some things I have found out in life will not be healed perfectly, but will be perfectly healed for each of us in Our Creator's timing and radiance. Some damage of thinking, of personality traits, of impulsiveness, of compulsiveness, of isolations will remain. But it will be overcome by grace. And it will take day by day time. And you are on that wonderful path. Bravo. When Jesus was on the Cross, He must have looked out and saw only His loyal Mother and a few accompanying women and John there. No other relatives. Mary also knew this too. She was virtually alone. And think not that she didn't carry sadness with her as she walked the rest of her life. She was not divine. And Jesus, when he arose from the dead, carried the scars of the Cross on his body. They were not healed perfectly. Just perfectly healed enough for us to know. Damage, scars, we CAN carry them. Fear, cowardess (me), lack fo fortitude, internal confusion, soul damage, can be carried. We take that yoke upon us. And walk acqwardly on, stumbling, backing up, backing out, facing up, failing. No one is living your life. No one walks in your shoes. No one in this entire God beloved world has your dna, your fingerprints, your personality, your anything. You are unique with a set of characteristics God gave you. I will say this about myself. I was raised by a highly damaged parent, who singled me out for trouble. Professionals told my Dad to get me away from her. Counsellors told me to leave her. But the Church told me to honor my mother. You see where this is going. I will say one wonderful thing about me (and perhaps you, too), I can distinguish love from non love, pure care from manipulating care, good from evil, rational thinking from irrational. This is good, especially in the face of a Church being run upside down, in the nuances of priests homilies that just don't ring right. The understanding of bible passages offered to us that are not quite complete. And a Pope who very few really understand. You do. I'm sure. Keep going. You are doing good. All will be well. All will be well. And in all things, all will be well. (Julian of Norwich?, I believe?)
I gotta admit, I have never before now heard the word "empath" in any context except Star Trek: The Next Generation. ^_^' I had to google it. That introversion can be confused with the empath / CPTSD thing…that gives me a lot to think about. I have some loved ones very close to me who describe themselves as introverted or shy, and this has me wondering if it might be more trauma-informed.
Thanks again for giving so much food for thought. :)
Thanks for this! It's relevant to some of my own struggles. I'm wired in a similar, though not identical, way to yourself.
Hi Steve, I think this talk by Msgr. James Shea provides great insight into differing world views and provides a clear path forward: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y_q7iV4MhKE
I mean, as far as "inefficacy" of the Sacraments, a lot of Twitter'll always give Judas a run for his money. Nothing will transform someone who doesn't want to be transformed, to save someone who doesn't want to be saved, so long as God respects Free Will. (And believe me, there's times I wish He didn't...) Much of Trad Twitter will worship the gods made in their own images until they cannot avoid the real one anymore at their particular judgements.
I find this post interesting because I had a lot of that same toxicity and "trauma," (not a fan of the word, honestly,) thanks to a bi-polar-II mother, but at the same point in time, thanks to the Asperger's from Dad, I never developed the "empath" people-assessment thing, at least not on the sort of instinctual level you describe. However, once I started chucking the things I *could* observe through the same part of my brain to which I fed calculus to in college, yeah, what you described was as "there" as I think it ever *could* be in my case. I realized that nothing angered my mother more than my not giving a heck, because it meant she couldn't manipulate me the way she could my two younger sisters. (Heck, I think those two sometimes resent me for it, too...)
However, I think now that not giving a heck is a superpower *until* it's because you *can't* give a heck. Before, I couldn't give a heck simply because of what I just didn't know. Now, I more often worry about becoming *too* numb, too cynical, too jaded, too bitter, you know?